I don't
swallow most of the tall tales but had noticed that eyewitnesses often seem
genuinely convinced about what they've seen. Good old Nessy is a fine wee
example. But does Nessy really exist? Of course not. Every Nessy documentary
that I've ever watched has robbed another hour of my life, an hour that I'll
never get back.
I feel happy
to have only wasted a few hours pondering the Nessy myth, unlike some Aussie
professors and Nordic scientists who featured in a couple of those
documentaries. Those people spent years studying Loch Ness's fabled mythology.
They spent all that time and money only to find ancient tree trunks down in the
murky depths of the Scottish loch rather than any living prehistoric relics.
It's so cold, forbidding and dank down there that even bacteria can't be
bothered getting up in the morning to help their microbial mates break down
ancient tree remains. I'm guessing that the chances of those chilly waters
playing host to a full-on Plesiosaurus is therefore for the birds?
After cramming
millions of pounds worth of sonar equipment onto old fishing boats (usually
called something like the Maisy Morag) they found out exactly what everyone
already knew; that Nessy is most probably the product of minds weakened by
years of gradual empicklement in cerebrospinal fluid largely consisting of
Scotch.
Bigfoot
Then we have
Bigfoot, the Yeti and other weird and wonderful humanoid apparitions that
allegedly plod their way around the world's remotest forests. I was astonished
to discover that there are entire cults dedicated to finding and proving the
existence of Bigfoot. But after many, many years of weirdness, none of these
cult members can convincingly demonstrate that such beings actually exist.
Because they don't. The weirdest things to be found in those forests are the
bearded Bigfoot hunters themselves, complete with their USA baseball caps and
badass guns. If Nessy is the product of Scotch whisky consumption, then we can
possibly attribute Bigfoot sightings to a combination of Budweiser supping and
prolonged periods of solitude.
Duende
I've even
heard Portuguese folk tell of strange mythological creatures known as the
Duende. Apparently these are small, leprechaun-like beings who go around
wearing large straw hats whilst whistling an enchanting melody. But beware the
Duende! If ever you see one, don't be fooled by their tiny form because the
Duende are renowned for their evil ways. You see, these ghastly Portugoblins
aren't known for being particularly kindly souls. Their enchanting whistling
resonates through the deep, forbidding forests of Portugal only to lure young
children into their darkest recesses. The poor little kids quickly lose their
bearings and are thereafter never seen again.
Chilling or
what?
Despite all my
measured skepticism regarding such tall tales, I have actually encountered a
strange creature in the forests of Portugal myself.
Portuguese
mystical creature
Whilst driving
along the Avenida Marginal from Cascais to Lisbon one day, I was delighted by
the fact that it had been yet another balmy late summer's day. But a dense sea
fog had threatened all afternoon. Occasional wisps had encroached onto the
golden sands of Cascais but not enough to deter any of the happy bathers or the
volleyball players. But as the sun began to sink, the thickening fog slowly
crept up the Tagus. By the time I reached Lisbon, only the highest points of
Ponte 25 de Abril's towers poked out of the mirk. As evening gradually fell
over the capital, the weather cleared just long enough to reveal a blood moon
which had secretly risen over the city from behind its foggy cloak.
After enjoying
a light meal in Lisbon, a long night's driving loomed. I aimed to reach the
Algarve early the following morning. Only a few minutes after crossing Ponte
25th de Abril, it was very obvious that the thickening fog was going to make
motorway driving a precarious affair. It was time to abandon the motorway and
choose an alternative route. So I peeled off, heading towards Alcácer do Sal
and the twisty delights of the N120.
Even at night,
the Portuguese countryside looked magnificent bathed in the exceptionally
bright moonlight. The fog was patchy and unpredictable as the southbound trek
unfolded town by town making for slow progress. Over the flat plains of the
Alentejo the fog was reduced to a low lying mist that just hovered a few feet
above the land like a wispy white blanket.
To the north
of Odemira, thicker patchy fog returned as the N120 weaved through forests and
scrubland. The road twists and climbs, dipping and diving into river valleys
and then back up the rolling hills which typify this region of Portugal. An
occasional glimpse of moonlight flickered and winked as I sped beneath the
tangled canopy on this densely forested stretch. It was around 3am and there
wasn't a soul to be seen anywhere. I hadn't seen any other traffic for miles. Then,
in the headlamps beams, I saw something.
Incredibly spooky
Now. I'm not
sure how to describe the apparition I beheld without the risk of sounding
melodramatic. But let me assure you, considering that I was by myself on an
eerily lonely road, miles from anywhere, this creature looked menacing. It was
ugly and incredibly spooky looking. And, no, it wasn't a reflection!
Seriously
though, it was a canine looking creature bigger than a Labrador, smaller than a
great dane and it looked a bit scruffy like an Irish wolfhound. Actually, it
didn't quite look altogether hound-like because it had arched shoulders like a
hyena. In the headlamp beams it appeared to be a sandy (fawn) colour and it had
glowy eyes. I guess the beast looked like a hairy-scary version of Scooby
Doo!
Even more
scarily, the creature was too stubborn to move out of the way on this narrow
stretch of road, so I instinctively stopped the car. The animal just stood
there, quite fearless, occasionally pacing back and forth. I dimmed the car
lights in case I was mistaking what looked like belligerence with the creature
simply being too dazed and frightened to move in the powerful beams. I hoped it
would scurry off into the forest and out of my path but instead it clambered up
onto a large craggy boulder at the side of the road and began to howl like a
wolf. I damn nearly cacked myself.
Having
clambered onto the boulder, the beastly creature was finally out of my way. I
pressed the pedal to the metal and screeched off into the night. I checked my
rear view mirror and realised with horror that the creature was running after
me! I composed myself and concentrated on the road ahead knowing that my car
could easily outpace my four legged tormentor. But wow! Was I scared!
Never mind
those wicked Duende. This thing was properly scary. I have christened it Cão da
Lua - the dreaded moon-hound of Odemira!
I still wonder
if my weary mind was playing tricks? What do you think I saw?
Douglas Hughes is a UK-based writer producing general interest articles ranging from travel pieces to classic motoring.